Psalm 41:4 “I said, Lord, be merciful unto me: heal my soul; for I have sinned against thee;”
Heal my soul… Isn’t that a lovely thought, that God would heal the soul? It sometimes seems to me as if the most valuable thing in the world would be to have a cheerful, upbeat attitude about everything. Pollyanna’s “Glad Game” as it were. Around the clock.
Heal my soul…
So what is the soul? And what is sickness of the soul? Is it possible that Christians have to endure seasons of sickness of soul, and that God is pleased by our hanging onto Him in faith?
What is the most valuable thing? Is it good health? Yet it is possible to have great physical health and tons of energy, yet still be downcast in the soul. Is it contentment and peace? It might be, except that our growing times are the trial times, and anyone who says Christians are supposed to just sail through those trials with a contented, peaceful smile are, as my mom used to say, talking like their foot’s asleep. It just doesn’t happen. Some of us, at least, can’t just turn off the bad feelings.
And so, I think the best thing to shoot for is faith. To hang on and not let go, regardless of the tears, regardless of humiliation and shame. To still believe that God is working it all together for good, and we just can’t see it yet.
Sometimes I wish I hadn’t read that book about HSP’s. It put a name on something that I knew was “wrong” or “different” about me, and when it put a name on it, it also seemed to empower that trait so that it could rear its ugly head and cause more damage in my life.
I’m having a hard time being glad about this, Pollyanna.